• Adult Children Exposed to Domestic Violence
  • Runaway & Homeless Youth Toolkit
  • Prevent Intimate Partner Violence
  • Violence Against Women Resource Library
  • Domestic Violence and Housing Technical Assistance Consortium
  • Domestic Violence Awareness Project
  • National Resource Center on Domestic Violence


 Create an account to save and access your bookmarked materials anytime, anywhere.

  create account  |   login

An Online Resource Library on Gender-Based Violence.

Boys won’t be boys. Boys will be what we teach them to be.

General Material
Published Date
January, 2019

In this TED Talk, speaker Ben Hurst rejects the use of the common phrase that "boys will be boys" as a "get-out-of-jail free" card for boys, men, and toxic masculinities. Instead, he states that boys will be what we teach them to be.

Citing Tony’s Porter’s TED talk, A Call to Men, Ben references the workshops he conducts with boys and young men to illustrate the pressure the patriarchy places on men to repress their feelings and embrace hyper-sexualization and violence. Ben believes that we need to challenge our assumptions around toxic forms of masculinity by encouraging conversation, providing space for men to express emotion, refusing to accept minimum standards of behavior and building positive masculinities.